Tag Archives: Forgiveness

Perfect Love

“My deepest awareness of myself is that I am deeply loved by Jesus Christ and I have done nothing to earn it or deserve it.”

–Brennan Manning

Matthew 5:

43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor[i] and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47 And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

Do you have an enemy? 

Someone you truly despise?

Okay–maybe not an enemy, but someone you would NEVER consider a friend?

Is it your boss?  Your ex?  Your Dad?  The jackass in the locker room?  The group of girls who won’t let you sit with them at the lunch table?

Get that person in your mind…think of all the things you dislike about them…

Got it?

Now picture Christ, hanging on the Cross, dying for that one person you don’t care for.  There’s no one else around: no guards, not Mary or any of the other followers.  It’s just Jesus and your enemy.  And Jesus is crying as he is dying, asking that person to come join him in Eternity.

Ever thought of it like that?  That Christ loves your enemy just as much as he loves you.  I’m sure you know God adores you, but are you willing to allow him to love those you don’t like?

It’s easy to love our closest loved ones and most-cherished friends, but Jesus told everyone that loving those who love you doesn’t amount to much because it isn’t really a challenge.  But if you can follow Christ in his mercy and genuine goodness toward all people, you are starting to “get it”.

If you love only your friends, then your love is imperfect and incomplete.

“But you don’t understand…!”

While I may not have experienced your specific trauma, I do know pain and anger and hurt and bitterness very well.  Those were the monkeys on my back for years.

Attempting to forgive an affair that hit very close to home several years ago sent me into a tailspin.  Have you read my story regarding the sexual abuse I experienced?  I’ve been there, I do understand how difficult forgiveness and love can be.

What about you? 

What if your enemy is your own self?  Do you hate yourself?  Do you loathe your behavior (past or present)?  Have you ever prayed (or at least wished) you were dead?  Brennan Manning said this, “Real freedom is freedom from the opinions of others. Above all, freedom from your opinions about yourself. ”

What would it take for you to find the freedom to love yourself?  Sounds funny, right?  But true freedom is that you can appreciate where you’ve come from, that you are hopeful about where you’re going, and that you love the place you are currently.  All have sinned…but God’s love never fails.

Let us be challenged to love others in the same way that Christ has loved us.

I’ll leave you with a wonderful story by my favorite author, Brennan Manning, from his book Ragamuffin Gospel:

Perhaps you’ve heard this story: Four years ago in a large city in the far West, rumors spread that a certain Catholic woman was having visions of Jesus. The reports reached the archbishop. He decided to check her out. There is always a fine line between the authentic mystic and the lunatic fringe.

“Is it true, ma’am, that you have visions of Jesus?” asked the cleric.

“Yes,” the woman replied simply.

“Well, the next time you have a vision, I want you to ask Jesus to tell you the sins that I confessed in my last confession.”

The woman was stunned. “Did I hear you right, bishop? You actually want me to ask Jesus to tell me the sins of your past?”

“Exactly. Please call me if anything happens.”

Ten days later the woman notified her spiritual leader of a recent apparition. “Please come,” she said.

Within the hour the archbishop arrived. He trusted eye-to-eye contact. “You just told me on the telephone that you actually had a vision of Jesus. Did you do what I asked?”

“Yes, bishop, I asked Jesus to tell me the sins you confessed in your last confession.”

The bishop leaned forward with anticipation. His eyes narrowed.

“What did Jesus say?”

She took his hand and gazed deep into his eyes. “Bishop,” she said, “these are his exact words: I CAN’T REMEMBER.’”

Thanks,

Steve

Forgiveness

The video above is an incredible reminder to all of us. Many of us remember the killing that happened in the Amish community several years ago, but watch this video as a reminder.

QUESTION: What is the hardest thing you’ve ever forgiven? How long did it take for you to process the forgiveness? What advice or encouragement would you give others who are dealing with a difficult situation?

Unforgiveness reminds me a lot of the movie “Backdraft”; remember that movie from the early 90′s? Check out this clip and then I’ll explain…

ln a word, Brian, what is this job all about?

Fire.

It's a living thing, Brian.

It breathes, it eats,

and it hates...
...to know this flame will spread this way 

across the door...

and up across the ceiling;

...because it wants to.
 
I picture a lack of forgiveness in much the same way.  It starts as 
just a small spark, but it grows.  The heat rises exponentially, 
becoming impossible to control, begging for oxygen: something to feed it.
And along comes someone who knows nothing of your bitterness, your 
anger, your hatefulness.  And they manage to crack open a window or 
door, and all the sudden, the fire BREATHES.  In a fraction of a second, 
the fire explodes, destroying everything in its reach.  It grows, it 
exhales and lives are destroyed.

Don't let this be you.  

If you have to, do what I have done on three different occasions 
when I faced unmentionable pain: pray the prayer (or meditate on 
the thought), "I choose to forgive".  You may not believe it for a 
while;  It may take years, like it did in my situation, but eventually, 
you'll believe what you have said.

Talk to someone, scream into your pillow, write it down, just get 
it out.  Somehow, someway, you have to deal with it, or it will 
deal with you.

Grace is messy,
Steve

Only love? That seems WAY too simple.

  • This weekend, Aaron Keyes said, “Isn’t it amazing that we are constantly fighting against God, yet He is always fighting for us?”
  • Though some sins may seem more heinous than others, forgiveness remains constant.  Actions change, “bad” seems to increase or decrease, but forgiveness remains the same, no matter what.  This makes me think of my Momma: she raised us three boys (each very different from the other), and each of us made some big goof-ups.  Even though some of those mistakes seemed bigger than others, and at times, one of us boys may have seemed “worse” than the others, Mom’s forgiveness was constant, her hope in our future was constant, and her love was constant.  We faltered and fumbled, but she didn’t. 
  • Yesterday, I listened to the true story of a man in his 50′s, who was badly bullied (because of a disability).  He was beaten up multiple times in high school, kicked in his genitals constantly, and later had to have a testicle removed, due to the physical trauma he endured as a teenager.  Where was the Good Samaritan for this guy?  I wanted to weep as I watched and listened.  We must do something to combat bullying.  We must.  I must.
  • 1 John 4:

    7-10 My beloved friends, let us continue to love each other since love comes from God. Everyone who loves is born of God and experiences a relationship with God (Steve’s thought: that seems WAY too simple). The person who refuses to love doesn’t know the first thing about God, because God is love—so you can’t know him if you don’t love (Steve’s thought: Wait, you mean you can have all kinds of knowledge, but if you don’t love, you don’t know God?). This is how God showed his love for us: God sent his only Son into the world so we might live through him. This is the kind of love we are talking about—not that we once upon a time loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to clear away our sins and the damage they’ve done to our relationship with God.

    11-12 My dear, dear friends, if God loved us like this, we certainly ought to love each other. No one has seen God, ever. But if we love one another, God dwells deeply within us (Steve’s thought: I think I’m seeing a pattern here…you telling me that it all hinges on love?), and his love becomes complete in us—perfect love!

    13-16 This is how we know we’re living steadily and deeply in him, and he in us: He’s given us life from his life, from his very own Spirit (Steve’s thought: where do “works” come into play?  This makes it sound like the whole thing rests on God’s shoulders and not on us.). Also, we’ve seen for ourselves and continue to state openly that the Father sent his Son as Savior of the world. Everyone who confesses that Jesus is God’s Son participates continuously in an intimate relationship with God. We know it so well, we’ve embraced it heart and soul, this love that comes from God.

    17-18 God is love. When we take up permanent residence in a life of love, we live in God and God lives in us. This way, love has the run of the house, becomes at home and mature in us, so that we’re free of worry on Judgment Day—our standing in the world is identical with Christ’s. There is no room in love for fear. Well-formed love banishes fear (Steve’s thought: So you mean to say that if we love God and love others, we have nothing to fear?  Awesome!). Since fear is crippling, a fearful life—fear of death, fear of judgment—is one not yet fully formed in love.

    19 We, though, are going to love—love and be loved. First we were loved, now we love. He loved us first.

    20-21 If anyone boasts, “I love God,” and goes right on hating his brother or sister, thinking nothing of it, he is a liar (Who exactly qualifies for “brother or sister” status?  You don’t mean we have to love drug addicts, prostitutes, and those creepy little homos do ya?). If he won’t love the person he can see, how can he love the God he can’t see? The command we have from Christ is blunt: Loving God includes loving people. You’ve got to love both. (Steve’s final thought: I’ve always said, “Love God and love people”, but actually I have been saying it wrong all along.  This says, “Loving God INCLUDES loving people.”  So I can’t say I love God, if I don’t love ALL the people He created.  I guess now, the only questions are “What does love look like?” and “Just how far does love go?”)

ATTIC,

Steve

Grace in the Manger

manger-cross

We cannot even begin to imagine what Heaven will be like!  We can’t wrap our minds around what Heaven looks like and feels like.  We can’t picture Heaven right now.  We just don’t get it.  It’s more glorious than glorious and more beautiful than beautiful!  The gold, the emeralds, the angels, the singing!

To think that Almighty God, the Creator, the King of Heaven, would leave perfection not to enter some place equally perfect, but God stepped down into total chaos and complete imperfection.  The King of Kings left perfection and stepped into a mess.

Grace became messy that day in a manger.

Just like Jesus was wrapped in swaddling clothes, Grace came down and wrapped this world in His arms.  He healed us, completed us, forgave us, and made us brand-new.  Grace came down and said, “I love you so much that I’m willing to get messy with your filth and mistakes.”

The manger is the perfect picture of messy grace.

ATTIC,

Steve